Santa is coming to Town

Christmas is coming... it's Kyle's first Christmas. I took kids to mall to see Santa and we also saw him at the Mom's club Christmas party. Devin is really excited about Christmas this year. She told Santa she wants a bike for Christmas. Kyle thinks Santa is a very scary man and doesn't want anything to do with him. He is screaming in the mall's Santa pictures. Oh well. We are all very excited. Kyle is still having issues with colds and diarrhea. Hope we can get it all figured out in 2009. We are leaving in a few days by airplane to see my parents and cousins, aunts and uncles. None of them have met Kyle yet. So, we can't wait. My parent's house is not kid-proof and has a large staircase which will be Kyle's ultimate goal to climb the whole time I'm there. So, it should be interesting.... Here are a few pictures of Kyle and Devin as we enjoy this holiday season...

Mom Appreciation Week

Well, I am now in San Diego for 4 1/2 days at an Equine practitioners convention. Jack is in charge of the kids. He says he is doing ok so far. He had a little freak out this morning when Kyle had a runny nose. Well, actually, more like a panic...but I calmed his fears it was a little cold and he would be ok. So, this is the week that Jack can appreciate all I do at the house. Thus, I call it Mom Appreciation Week. The kids seem to be doing well and Devin is gabbing up a storm to me when I call. Kyle can't verbalize if he misses me... so I hope he is ok. He has bonded well to Jack, so I feel comfortable that he is in his regular routine and with Dad & sister.

The convention is going well. It is really a catch 22 being away from the kids... you relish the adult conversation, eating out, and some peace... but you miss the kids a lot too. Its only been 2 days --- I will definately be ready to go home by Wednesday. I plan on missing morning sessions tomorrow morning and having some "me" time. I will sleep in, eat leisurely, read emails, read my book and maybe work out. I guess it depends how I feel. Then, I will go to meeting all afternoon and banquet tomorrow night.

I took Kyle to pediatrician last week. He is 13 months. He weighs 18lbs 15 oz (5% for weight) and 29" tall (10% for height). I call him little but mighty. He is very strong and has no fear and is always busy running around. He has a long body and really short legs... so I have to buy him 6-12mos size pants because his legs are so short. He refuses to wear sneakers... has a temper tantrum.. won't walk and tries to pull them off. But, he will let me put mocassins on. So, that is what he wears. Anyway, doctor says he definately has a milk allergy. Plus, I have tried him on soy milk and lactaid too... he doesn't tolerate either of those. So, its back to soy formula again. He is doing well on it. I may have to keep him on soy formula for many more months. He also got his influenza vaccine. He only got one vaccine b/c he had a bad reaction in the past. He did very well this time and we are going to do one at a time every few weeks until he is caught up. He has another cold right now... I think this is the 3rd since coming home from Vietnam.

We went to a Vietnamese playgroup last weekend at Kelley's house. She adopted a boy from the same orphanage and agency as Kyle. Her son, Henry, was adopted about 6 weeks after Kyle. It was great to see him again. He looks much better. He was a special needs kid and did not get good care at the orphanage. Kelley is still working on bonding/attaching with him b/c of his neglect in the orphanage. Plus, she is still dealing with his medical issues. I hope they find a diagnosis and can help him. He has the most hypnotic , deep penetrating eyes. They really touch me. I also got to meet Julie and her 2 daughters... one is also adopted from same agency as Kyle. There were 2 other mothers there who adopted from Vietnam but through another agency. It was pretty cool. Unfortunately, I am always trying to do to much at once and had to leave early to get ready to leave for San Diego.

Milk allergy

Unfortunately,I think Kyle has a true milk allergy or milk intolerance. When I first got him from the orphanage, we brought him back to our bungalow in Danang and later realized he has massive and stinky diarrhea. Course, no one mentioned this and we didn't know how long he had diarrhea. None of the other babies in our group had diarrhea. When we got back to the states, we had his feces tested for parasites which came back negative. Kyle's pediatrician went ahead and treated him with Flagyl "just in case". I decided to go ahead and switch him to soy formula b/c had a mild rash on his face & body and b/c he was a restlous sleeper. I noticed an immediate improvement in the odor after switching him to soy. The diarrhea took another 10 days or so to resolve. Since then, he has the occasional diarrhea which has been difficult to figure out.

Last week, I gave him Lactaid at his cousin's house one night, the next day his feces were loose... and then he got bad diarrhea for 3 days. When I say bad... I mean blow out the diaper all over your clothes, up your shirt, on your bed & sheets BAD. I told Kyle... don't move... Mommy's gonna go get a towel... I wrapped him (& sheets) and clothes and carried everything to tub and stuck him under the faucet! It was so gross. He also got diarrhea the day after his birthday. I did give him chocolate cake & icing. Now that I look back... it was probably milk chocolate icing. I have also given him a few bites of ice cream... and then he got diarrhea the next day. He usually doesn't get diarrhea right away but the next day. He also still spits up a lot... that's gross too. Gotta love nasty partially digested soy milk up-chucked on your clothes EVERY DAY. It stinks. Thus, I stink.

I looked up milk allergies on the internet and some studies say 100% of people from Southeast Asia have milk intolerance some time in their lives. They are not lactase deficient, but rather have intolerance to some milk proteins. Not surprised, there was hardly any milk in Vietnam when we were there. No dairy cows either.

I have already discussed this with Kyle's pediatrician before...but have another appt in a week to discuss in more detail. Don't know a whole lot about food allergies... but I am learning.

Kyle's 1st birthday

OK- first I have to say I know I'm lame at keeping my blog updated. I have to say keeping up with 2 toddlers has been a challenge for me. Devin gave up her naps as soon as we got back from Vietnam...so there is no down time anymore. Bummer. I have to say mid-Sept to mid- October was a really rough time for me. Kyle was REALLY clingy and whiny and I was beside myself. I really had a rough time and was stressed. He is doing much better now and much less whiny. Thank God. I was feeling like... "What have I got myself into?!" I brought it up on my agency chat group and got slammed by another mother like " you need to carry him at all times and never let him down". What?! I don't think so. I can show my son love and affection and be a good mom without holding him all the time. Anyway, he is doing a lot better and I have also been figuring out what works/ what doesn't work with Kyle. He & Devin love being together... although there definately are some squabbles. He bit Devin last week when he was excited. She screamed bloody murder (left a big mark). The next day, she scratched him in the face, on purpose, when he wanted to play with her and she didn't want to share.

Kyle is now walking and chasing his sister around the house. He learns very quickly and can say a few words now.... Mama, Dada, bye (and waves), car , ball, and don't. He is eating finger foods and is willing to try anything. We are still having some issues with intermittent diarrhea. I haven't totally figured that out yet. He is now sleeping well and taking good naps and sleeps well at night.

We had a small family party for him on Sunday for his 1st birthday. He LOVES chocolate cake and ate a whole cupcake by himself! He says Mmmm... mmmm.... (like yumm yummm). Course, it gave him diarrhea the next day..oh well.

How Fun is Halloween?!

Halloween is fun. That's all there is to it...what's more fun than dressing up and getting free candy?! Not much. Besides Christmas, Halloween is definately my favorite holiday. It is so much fun to celebrate it again with my kids. We went to a Halloween bash last weekend with Eric, Krista & Zanderman at Goodyear Park and dressed up, ate food, went to the "spooky house" and saw fireworks. Then, on Sunday, the family went to Boo at the Zoo at the Phoenix Zoo. Then, we went to a Mom's club Halloween party on Tuesday... dressed up again and ate fun food and played with other kids. For Halloween, we went to my brother's neighborhood for trick-or- treating. Kyle was in awe at all the Halloween costumes. He came with us in the stroller. Devin loved it and ran giggling from house to house. All week long she has been saying "Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat." She was a lion AGAIN this year. Tried to convince her to be something else... but she wanted to roar at people... so lion it is. Kyle was a dinosaur. So cute. Got the costume from a guy who also adopted a boy from Vietnam. Here are a few fun photos of the kids this past week. The storm trooper is Alexander- my kids' cousin.

My "Other" Job

I have been back to work for 5 weeks now. I must say... I love it. Some people are great at being 24/7 "stay at home" mom's. They like to discuss what they are going to cook for dinner, where to get coupons, what outfit they hand-made for their kids for Halloween, how they hand-made their cards and curtains. I am not one of those people. House work is not my thing. Personally, I'd rather clean stalls or do yardwork. Last week, I went to Lowe's and bought new shrubs and planted them. I loved it. Don't get me wrong. I love being a mother and love my kids. But, outside the "Mom's club" that I am member of, most people who know me think of me as a veterinarian who has kids... not the other way around.

I like being known and respected in my community as a veterinarian. It is a highly sought-after and respected job. As a matter of fact, in national surveys, veterinarian is rated in the top 5 jobs as the most truthful and respected people in the country. I have always wanted to be a veterinarian my entire life. I believe in "love what you do and do what you love." I like going to work. I think it makes me a better mother. It gives me a purpose in life and also a break from the kids. I like the challenge of the job physically and mentally and my relationships with my clients and my patients. I like working outside and not in an office. I like making my own hours and setting my schedule. Yes, it is a challenge to balance being a mother and having a career. However, I hope that my kids will be proud when they talk about me and my accomplishments. I hope they will see that you can be a successful mother and have a successful career at the same time. I hope that they feel that if you want to do something ... if you have a goal... you can be anything you want to be.

Above are some pictures of my workday...some of of me, some of my colleagues, and some of my patients...

A Happy Day

OK- I am better today. No venting. Jack & I had a long talk last night. I feel happier today. He is going to try to help more with the kids and gave me some good ideas to reduce my stress. Kyle is doing well today and the both kids are happy and less whiny today. Yea :). I guess when God realizes you have had enough... he gives you a break just when you need it. Kids went to daycare today and are much happier tonight.

On a good note, I received the Presidential's Citation Alumnae reward at my alma mater, University of Delaware over the weekend. My parents attended the awards ceremony for me and said it was great. Wish I could have gone... but had to work this weekend. You can check it out at....
http://www.udconnection.com/Presidential-Citation-Award-Winners-2008

Post-Adoption Blues

Ok, I will admit, I have not been myself for the last month. I would not go as far as to say I am "depressed". But, I am definately more impatient, irritable and occasionally tearful. As stated in my last post, Kyle is clingy. It is hard on me. There is no other way to put it. My daughter is a drama queen and also very clingy. My husband "helps" with the kids...but ultimately, I do the primary care. They do not cling to him, so he doesn't know how it is. EVERY time I leave the kids...it's drama, drama, drama. Devin is actually the instigator and then Kyle gets upset b/c she is. She needs hugs and kisses a thousand times, and if you deny the "one more time" she will have a melt down. She even does it when I leave her with my husband! Kyle is starting to clue in on when I'm going to leave.. and starts the whining... Jack is not helpful in this area... I really thought he'd help more with the kids since he was so great in Vietnam. But, that hasn't been the case. He thinks helping do the dishes is his contribution to raising two toddlers. Although I'm glad he helps with the dishes, it does not help with the neediness factor.

Kyle can play by himself often but is very clingy at other times. Today, when I was holding him... he was squirming all over like a jackrabbit pulling away from me... so I put him down on the ground. Then, he had a temper-tantrum b/c I put him down and proceeded to throw his head forward in anger and smack his mouth on my chair and got a bloody lip. 2nd major boo-boo today... he already has a band-aid on his head from hitting his head this morning when he fell over (learning how to walk).

I must admit, I am so happy to go to work 3 days a week to get a break. Sometimes I feel like I'm being smothered by the constant neediness. It is hard thing to admit since it has taken me so many years to even have 2 kids... and now I'm complaining. I just didn't think it was going to be this hard. Ok- another kid crying for no reason (my daughter)... so gotta go.... Mama mama mama!!!!

Attachment & Whining

OK...my son is whiner. We have had him a little over 2 months now. On the whole, he has adjusted very well.... he is sleeping through the night fairly well now (some nights better than others). He is well attached to us... there lies the problem. He is VERY attached to me. He whines for me A LOT. He also does this to my daycare lady (both my kids go to a small homecare when I work 3 days a week). I can tell it is wearing her out... it does me too.

He is very clingy. I understand this is somewhat normal in adopted kids. However, we have to be able to put him down. He doesn't do this to my husband, her husband or my daughter... just me & her. I have another daughter who also needs A LOT of attention right now. And, I work and have to do every day activities (go to the bathroom, help my daughter when she goes potty, get her dressed / hair brushed, etc). I do sometimes carry him in my bjorn or backpack.. but it hurts my back to do it all the time. Sometimes he will get over it in a minute or two and move on. Sometimes he has an all out temper- tantrum. He smiles and is happy as soon as I pick him up. I realize he wants me to hold him all the time.. but I can't. My bio daughter did not do this so I don't know quite how to handle it. I realize he needs extra love & attention & we have not had him that long.I am told by other adoptive parents that he is not fully attached yet... but attaching and needs the extra TLC right now. They say this phase will pass and that I just have to get through it... I hope so. If I discipline him at all when he throws a temper tantrum (he does sometimes when I change him or dress him)--- I give him a stern "No"...he gets very hurt and tears well up in his eyes. I guess they lines are fuzzy for me b/c he is adopted... Also, he does not do this all the time but some days it really wears me down. When I give him full attention ... he really is a great kid and lots of fun. But, if I don't give him full attention when he wants it .... he just whines and whines...

Don't get me wrong... I love him with all my heart and he is a fun kid. He is a joy to have around a majority of the time. He is almost walking now - he can walk 5-6 steps at a time and uses the walker like a crazy man. He can say Mama and Dada and Ba (ball). He is still small~ 18 lbs and in 6-12mos clothes. He loves his sister and the wrestle and play together a lot. He is eating all the small finger foods and will eat almost everything I offer them. Well, that's what's going on right now...

New Pictures of Kyle & Devin

Havent' posted in a while... here are some recent photos... will try to post more later today...

Welcome Home Kyle Party

I haven't posted for a couple weeks...my daughter Devin gave up her naps which has totally bummed me out. It's my only "me" time to get things done... emails, reading, yard work, or watch a DVD. So, I haven't had a chance to post. Plus, I went back to work 2 weeks ago. I have to say... I love being back to work. Taking care of two toddler is HARD! I have to go to work so I can rest. :) Kyle is doing great at childcare. He & Devin go together to a homecare (Miss Julie's) and they are both doing well. I think it has helped having them together. Plus, it's easier on me to only have one place to pick up & drop off at.

Last night, my brother Eric & his wife Krista had a "Welcome Home Kyle" party. It was a great success. My sister Katherine surprised me and flew from San Fran to attend as a surprise. They pretended to need to borrow a cooler on Friday night to come over to my house. It was definately a surprise... I had no clue... and I'm a hard one to pull a surprise on. It was after- work, I was in my grubbies with hair in pony-tail, house not so clean, and eating popcorn and a beer for dinner. I know that sounds bad... but I DID feed the kids a nutritious meal! Do as I say...not as I do! haha. Katherine spent the night and stayed with me on Saturday to catch up and get to visit with Kyle.

On Saturday night, we had a great time at Kyle's party. There were a lot of friends and family there. Kyle did great. He is standing and cruising and using his walker. He will be walking very soon. He has 8 teeth in now and is quite a biter (happy or teething bites... but bites all the same.. OUCH). He did very well for the big crowd. He gets a little intimidated by a lot of people ...but took it in stride. He can now say Mama and Dada... directed towards Me & Jack. Devin was a bit wound-up yesterday b/c of Katherine visiting and the party. She is sacked out on the floor right now (1st time she's napped for me in 3 weeks). Today, we opened all the gifts for Kyle and everyone was so generous... lots of nice clothes, books, and toys. I will use some of the gift cards to buy him a new car seat. That's all for now... the little Dude just woke up....

Super Mom- NOT!

I have some good news to toot my own horn... I was selected as a recipient of the 2008 University of Delaware Presidential Citation for Outstanding Achievement. This honor is given to graduates who exhibit great promise in their profession or public service activities. Wow. My Animal Science professor, Dr. Lesa Griffiths nominated me for this award. She found me through my clinic website... www.durangoequine.com. Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend the awards banquet in October since I just got back from Vietnam and plan on going back East for Christmas to visit family (and have family meet Kyle). Plus, I already committed to work to take appointments that weekend since all the other doctors will be out of town. So, my parents will attend for me and read a blerb I will write up.
Another Mom recently asked me, "How do you do it? How do you balance career and two toddlers, all my animals and everyday tasks?" Well, that's because I'm super Mom.... he he he.... gave myself a little chuckle there.... definately NOT! Stephanie, from my Mom's club summed it up the other day... "It's easier to broker million dollar deals with a bunch of difficult old men then to try to negotiate with a toddler." Seriously! At least the men don't throw themselves on the floor when the don't get their way and wail uncontrollably for 10 minutes. Well, I do get things done... but certainly not with finesse. There are quite a few things that gotta give when you have a career and kids (especially toddlers/ babies)....

House not immaculately clean.... just not gonna happen around here. Fortunately, we have a house cleaning lady who comes every other week to "deep clean" the house. My house is still messy, but at least it's not filthy. :)

No gourmet meals. Martha Stuart, I am not. Quick, easy meals. Better yet, Bertoli's stove-top ready made meals are the best and taste good too. I'm not a member of the recipe club for a reason... don't have the time or inclination to cook fancy meals. And even if I did have the time, I'd rather do something else. Sorry Jack.

Late. I'm usually barely making it or a little late. Heck, I'm happy if I show up at all. Even if I get up early or have plenty of time... I just can't seem to make it on time... right when I'm just about out the door... Devin needs her doll, Kyle's got a poopy diaper... it's always SOMETHING. I have a very difficult time being on time.

Always a little frazzled. I used to wonder why my sister Katherine always looked worn out and a little frazzled when she had toddlers.. now I know why. Can't have a conversation on the phone uninterupted to save my life.

Looking a little frumpy. Yup, since I've been home for the last month with the kids... I'm starting to look like the frumpy housewife. Sorry Jack. You know the look.... big shirt, baggy pants or jean shorts, hair in a pony tail, no shower, little or no makeup. LOVELY.

Not enough time to work-out or ride my horses. I finally got on a good work-out schedule with Devin and now it's all upside down again. I haven't taken Kyle to gym yet b/c not sure how he will do in childcare.... will wait to see how he does at Julie's this coming week (my home-care lady).

Well, as you can see, I am not super-mom. There is no such thing. Something always has to give. You can't do it all. I am back to work on Monday. Kyle & Devin will be going to daycare together. I hope everything goes ok. He has already visited a few times and she has all his stuff ready to go. By the way, did I mention Kyle can say "Mama"- it's awesome- and directed to me. Tonight, Jack and I are going to his best friend Steve's 50th birthday party.. 70's party... costume required. We got a babysitter and are ready to party.... it starts at 9pm (my bedtime- haha)...so hope I don't poop out. Should be fun.. will post pictures later. Well, gotta go feed Kyle and do "Mom things".

Kyle Home for 3 weeks

Kyle playing with Dad...

Devin & Kyle having their milk together before bedtime... so sweet.

Well, Kyle has been home for 3 weeks now and we have had him almost 5 weeks. Hard to believe. Time flies. He is doing well now. We have the night sleeping done pretty well. He still wakes up frequently, but we can soothe him down pretty quick. He is now taking naps and sleeping in his crib. He is eating well and eating 2-3 large jars of baby food a day. I did switch him to Soy formula a couple weeks ago as well as put him on a course of flagyl. We saw immediate improvement in the odor of his poop. It went from a toxic wasteland odor to normal in 1-2 days. The diarrhea took another week to resolve. Now, he has normal "BM's". Thank God for that. Jack would gag everytime he pooped before... which means I've had to change all the poopy diapers for the last month... not it's time to share that responsibility. Also, his face rash/ blotchiness resolved after about a week after the switch as well. All is well... so we will leave him on soy formula for now.

Got all Kyle's test results back... all normal and negative. Our doctor had the following tests run... HIV, Hepatitis B &C, syphylis, CBC, liver/kidney enzymes, TB, hepatitis antibody titers and fecal parisitology tests. They were all negative or normal. Yea!!! Since we know nothing about his parents... its a huge relief to know he doesn't have any underlying disease. Also, his antibody titer for hepatitis were positive... proving he had the vaccine they claimed he did and his body has immunity. I also had his hearing checked last week. I know he can hear...but he never had an auditory exam at birth like they do in the US. They check his tympanic membrane integrity and hearing on various levels. Everything was completely normal.

When we got him, he had 5 teeth already in... 2 upper and 3 lower. Well, he is now "teething" and 3 teeth are coming in at once!! Poor guy. He was teething so bad yesterday he bit his lip and started to bleed. Had to give him some ibuprofen this morning.. he was very grumpy. It really helped a lot. Speaking of teething... he bites. He just started doing that a few days ago... he gets so excited when we play with him and wants to chew on everything.... and them "chomp." It really hurts b/c he has teeth! Gotta break him of that habit quick! I also had his haircut for the first time last week. He did very well and no fuss at all when they buzzed his head. His hair was "old man's hair" ... long in back & on sides... short on top with a comb over. It looks really cute now. Took him to the public pool for the first time yesterday. He LOVED it.... couldn't slow him down. The boy has no fear- just the opposite of Devin. I took them both to the mall the other day too. Got some photos done at Kiddie Kandids. I got Devin's 4 year old pictures done and then had one taken of them both. It was an ok picture... not great b/c we couldn't get them both looking at us and smiling at same time. Tried to get Kyle's done by himself , but that didn't work this time. Will try again when he is 1 year old in a couple months.

I am finally figuiring out how to use my YouTube. I have posted 2-3 videos. The first 2 are when we first met Kyle at the orphanage in Vietnam. I am trying to download a new one of Devin & Kyle playing peek-a-boo at the house. You can watch them by going to: www.youtube.com/user/thhulse.

Devin & Papa & Grandma Hulse.